Chapter Three

Here is our update for chapter 3. This week was about insecurity and these are the main points...

The men who were surveyed, said that most men are hiding a deep inner uncertainty or insecurity, no matter how successful or confident they appear.

Most men have a huge unspoken fear of failure, both at work and at home... a fear that they do not know what they are doing, and will sooner or later be found out.

This fear is sometimes why men work such long hours and are driven to work so hard

Men often judge themselves (and feel that others judge them) based on the happiness and respect of their wives.

Men need to be affirmed or encouraged by their wives... we need to let them know that they are doing a good job as a husband and father and make home a 'safe place'. If he know that his wife believes in him, he will have the power to do better in every area of his life.

If a man is not affirmed or encouraged at home, he will look for it somewhere else (work, sports, through the computer, or other women).

Sex plays a huge role in supporting our man and building his self-confidence. If he feels affirmed sexually, he will be able to handle the rest of the world no problem

Here are some questions to think about...

1. Do you think that your man feels secretly insecure at work? at home?.

2. What do you do to make your home a 'safe place' for your husband? What can you do better?

Here are some questions to discuss with your husband, if you would like...

1. Do you think that most men feel insecure much of the time? Do you ever feel that way?

2. How do I make you feel as a husband? father? provider? lover?

3. Do you feel like home is a 'safe place' for you to come home to? (Do you feel unconditionally accepted?) What can I do better to make our home feel 'safe'?